As Christians I feel there is the age old question constantly on the table…”am I really following God’s will…or am I following my will and fitting God into it?” (if you haven’t read Mike Yaconelli’s, Messy Spirituality…go get it now). This is something I ponder all the time…especially now, knowing that we are only with Amor in Mexico’s mission field for a year. It is my nature to question and doubt my self…here is an example of a day inside my head:
“…if we followed God here, did we stop once we arrived? Are we still constantly pursuing Christ? As for next year - is it too soon to wonder? Am I am already willing away this year and overlooking the things God is doing with us now?”
Being a Christian creates a lot of questions. One thing we are learning is that a part of living by faith is being okay with the fact that you may never find those answers. We aren’t called to know the whole picture. If we were we would no longer need to trust in God. That’s what faith is. Trusting that if you are wholeheartedly pursuing Christ in time He will provide the answers you need (not want - ah, the tricky part).
Andrew and I have been having some really good talks about the future and if we really feel we are being used here. We both came up with, yes…we most definitely are. We’ve realized that working at Amor for a year and serving the people in Mexico doesn’t mean that is the only way God is using us. We need to be open to Him using us with people…even people outside of Amor, people in San Diego. Maybe we live in the US still for a reason. We are making friends that are impacting us and we are impacting them.
Hopefully we are showing others that living by faith is possible…even on little money…especially on little money. And maybe that’s the reason we are here. We are realizing that you can be used anywhere…in an office…in a Mexican desert…in a suburban Bible study. You don’t have to be “in the field” to do mission work. By pursuing Christ you are a missionary by example. Stop worrying about where you’re going to be next. Start living in the now or you might stand in the way of God’s present plan.
